[ As if Nick needs to even make that request -- who the hell else would Reggie choose, and why, when he's this content right here? -- but Reggie is strangely happy to hear it regardless. For all the complications this drops into their lap for them to either deal with eventually or continue to ignore, he likes knowing that he's wanted, and as wanted.
For now this is a lot. It's plenty. ]
I don't want anyone else. And if we could be together normally-- believe me, if I could just sleep with you, I would.
[ Which is easy to say, though in practice it might be harder. Reggie loves Nick, but even if he hasn't really fully examined the fact yet, he's developed such varied forms of intimacy with most of his regular partners in Duplicity that it would still be hard to let some of them go. Archie, or Raven, or Derek, that's all... it's different than love, he's pretty damn sure of that, but Reggie doesn't know what it is or why it'd be so hard to lose, and in more than just the typical "he likes having sex with people" way.
It's more than sex, those are specific types of intimacy (in general, or with some of those specific people) that he can only have here, some of which he's always needed, but then--
But then, so is what he has with Nick, and that's more important. Love is all about making sacrifices when you have to anyway, isn't it? ]
When you were gone I didn't even know what to do with myself.
[ Reggie bites the inside of his cheek, quiet for a few long seconds as he works his jaw to one side, figuring out what he wants to say. It's not that he wants Nick to get jealous, but he doesn't entirely know what to make of the fact that he rarely ever seems to-- witch culture, Reggie knows, but that doesn't make it any easier to get used to, especially not from the perspective of someone Nick says he's in love with. Reggie gets jealous all the time, even knowing there's not a damn thing he can do about it.
He shrugs a little, or as much as he can while lying on his back like this, just a loose upward roll of his shoulders. ]
I'm sure Derek would be fine with it. I don't even know if he's into it or is just humoring me with what he thinks I want. [ Or rather, "knows." ] And I never wanted Dorian in the first place.
[ He doesn't comment on Archie, though; that's too complicated for him to come up with a response. He just kisses Nick again, letting his head sink more deeply against his pillow. ]
But if it's all the same to you, then fine. Nothing has to change.
[He tips his face up just a little bit, like he's thinking about it. He reaches for his face, and looks at him for a long moment, and then he laughs just a little bit. Hi, sweetheart.
He shakes his head.]
Derek likes your cock. Don't let him let you think otherwise.
[Nick knows.]
And Dorian-
[There's an easy shrug.]
Use him for what he knows. It won't offend him.
[He's friends with Dorian and he thinks that, no less.]
How did you-- [ Reggie's eyebrows raise a little, surprised. Does Nick know what happened while he was gone...? ] I mean yeah, everybody does, but that's not exactly what I meant.
[ He wets his lips a little, nodding in vague response to what Nick says about Dorian, if only because he doesn't actually want to think too much about what happened between them right now. Not that it hadn't been quite good at the time, but he still feels weird about it, and it's a weirdness Reggie doesn't quite know what to do with.
He laughs a little now too, half nervously and half strangely tension-breaking. ]
[He says it, and lies his head on Reggie's chest, like he'll be falling asleep soon. He actually doesn't want to know, now. Now, he just wants to feel-
-Heaven.
He just wants to feel loved, and Reggie gives him that.]
Go back to sleep. I'll wake you again if you have nightmares.
[ Reggie's fingers are in Nick's hair again, playing with it idly but with affection. He's not sure he wants to sleep now either, he's just on the wrong side of "too awake" now to easily drift off again, and it feels less and less worth it to try.
He'll be tired as hell later, sure, but he can always take a nap. ]
I don't wanna sleep now. I'm not tired anymore. [ His hand moves down, stroking slowly over Nick's spine. ] But have you slept at all?
[He's still dressed, no less, but he doesn't really feel like getting up. He actually...kind of feels like sleeping. It wouldn't go amiss, anyway. He closes his eyes and almost purrs at the touch, luxuriating in the feeling.]
I only slept a little last night.
[Almost a full twenty-four hours without sleep, really. He hasn't been sleeping well, even though he drew a binding circle under their bed. He couldn't get Reggie to vacate the bed without making it a Thing, so sleep has been hard-pressed to come.]
[ Reggie continues stroking Nick, his spine and his hair, soothing and affectionate, trying to decide what he should do. He's fine with letting Nick rest, and he understands that part of that is going to involve Nick resting on him, but-- even if he turns off his phone alarm and skips running today, he'll have to get up eventually.
At least to get them food, and probably also coffee. ]
Then you should sleep. Here--
[ He rolls them gently onto their sides, so Reggie can wrap his arm over Nick and spoon him. ]
[He doesn't clarify. He wants to make Reggie promise to leave, if things get bad, if suddenly he wakes up and it's not Nick at the helm.
But he won't get Reggie to promise that, so he just closes his eyes and lets him think. Promise you'll go and promise you'll stay are both the same promise, he thinks. He's so tired, he holds his hands close.]
Promise.
[He says it quietly, this time, but the truth is that he's so warm and that he falls asleep almost right away.]
[ Which is all Reggie says, because he doesn't know what specifically he's meant to be promising -- he can guess, but he doesn't know -- and because he can feel Nick falling asleep even before he's finished speaking.
He holds Nick close, stroking his hair and kissing his neck softly. Reggie's body is warm, his arms are firm, and his breathing is even; he's tailor made for these moments, for holding someone until they feel safe and drift off to sleep, and he'll stay there a while, probably falling back asleep himself.
But when Reggie wakes up again and Nick is still asleep, he'll carefully get out of bed just so he can get some tea (coffee for himself), as well as donuts and pizza, just so there will be food whenever Nick inevitably wakes up hungry. Once that's done, though, Reggie will have gotten back into bed to resume spooning. ]
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[ As if Nick needs to even make that request -- who the hell else would Reggie choose, and why, when he's this content right here? -- but Reggie is strangely happy to hear it regardless. For all the complications this drops into their lap for them to either deal with eventually or continue to ignore, he likes knowing that he's wanted, and as wanted.
For now this is a lot. It's plenty. ]
I don't want anyone else. And if we could be together normally-- believe me, if I could just sleep with you, I would.
[ Which is easy to say, though in practice it might be harder. Reggie loves Nick, but even if he hasn't really fully examined the fact yet, he's developed such varied forms of intimacy with most of his regular partners in Duplicity that it would still be hard to let some of them go. Archie, or Raven, or Derek, that's all... it's different than love, he's pretty damn sure of that, but Reggie doesn't know what it is or why it'd be so hard to lose, and in more than just the typical "he likes having sex with people" way.
It's more than sex, those are specific types of intimacy (in general, or with some of those specific people) that he can only have here, some of which he's always needed, but then--
But then, so is what he has with Nick, and that's more important. Love is all about making sacrifices when you have to anyway, isn't it? ]
When you were gone I didn't even know what to do with myself.
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[He laughs a little.]
Archie?
[He kisses Reggie, easily.]
Dorian?
[He closes his eyes and breathes in, and out.]
I don't want you to. I don't want you to feel anything but free to have or not have whatever you want.
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He shrugs a little, or as much as he can while lying on his back like this, just a loose upward roll of his shoulders. ]
I'm sure Derek would be fine with it. I don't even know if he's into it or is just humoring me with what he thinks I want. [ Or rather, "knows." ] And I never wanted Dorian in the first place.
[ He doesn't comment on Archie, though; that's too complicated for him to come up with a response. He just kisses Nick again, letting his head sink more deeply against his pillow. ]
But if it's all the same to you, then fine. Nothing has to change.
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He shakes his head.]
Derek likes your cock. Don't let him let you think otherwise.
[Nick knows.]
And Dorian-
[There's an easy shrug.]
Use him for what he knows. It won't offend him.
[He's friends with Dorian and he thinks that, no less.]
But nothing on Archie, then.
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[ He wets his lips a little, nodding in vague response to what Nick says about Dorian, if only because he doesn't actually want to think too much about what happened between them right now. Not that it hadn't been quite good at the time, but he still feels weird about it, and it's a weirdness Reggie doesn't quite know what to do with.
He laughs a little now too, half nervously and half strangely tension-breaking. ]
What do you want me to say about Archie?
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[He says it, and lies his head on Reggie's chest, like he'll be falling asleep soon. He actually doesn't want to know, now. Now, he just wants to feel-
-Heaven.
He just wants to feel loved, and Reggie gives him that.]
Go back to sleep. I'll wake you again if you have nightmares.
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[ Reggie's fingers are in Nick's hair again, playing with it idly but with affection. He's not sure he wants to sleep now either, he's just on the wrong side of "too awake" now to easily drift off again, and it feels less and less worth it to try.
He'll be tired as hell later, sure, but he can always take a nap. ]
I don't wanna sleep now. I'm not tired anymore. [ His hand moves down, stroking slowly over Nick's spine. ] But have you slept at all?
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[He's still dressed, no less, but he doesn't really feel like getting up. He actually...kind of feels like sleeping. It wouldn't go amiss, anyway. He closes his eyes and almost purrs at the touch, luxuriating in the feeling.]
I only slept a little last night.
[Almost a full twenty-four hours without sleep, really. He hasn't been sleeping well, even though he drew a binding circle under their bed. He couldn't get Reggie to vacate the bed without making it a Thing, so sleep has been hard-pressed to come.]
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At least to get them food, and probably also coffee. ]
Then you should sleep. Here--
[ He rolls them gently onto their sides, so Reggie can wrap his arm over Nick and spoon him. ]
Just relax, I've got you.
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[He doesn't clarify. He wants to make Reggie promise to leave, if things get bad, if suddenly he wakes up and it's not Nick at the helm.
But he won't get Reggie to promise that, so he just closes his eyes and lets him think. Promise you'll go and promise you'll stay are both the same promise, he thinks. He's so tired, he holds his hands close.]
Promise.
[He says it quietly, this time, but the truth is that he's so warm and that he falls asleep almost right away.]
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[ Which is all Reggie says, because he doesn't know what specifically he's meant to be promising -- he can guess, but he doesn't know -- and because he can feel Nick falling asleep even before he's finished speaking.
He holds Nick close, stroking his hair and kissing his neck softly. Reggie's body is warm, his arms are firm, and his breathing is even; he's tailor made for these moments, for holding someone until they feel safe and drift off to sleep, and he'll stay there a while, probably falling back asleep himself.
But when Reggie wakes up again and Nick is still asleep, he'll carefully get out of bed just so he can get some tea (coffee for himself), as well as donuts and pizza, just so there will be food whenever Nick inevitably wakes up hungry. Once that's done, though, Reggie will have gotten back into bed to resume spooning. ]