Hell if I know. Life doesn't always work out the way everyone wants it to. [ Blunt, but not combative; it's just the truth. ] And mostly cuz it takes two people to be in love.
[ Nick's drinking that down pretty fast. Reggie puts a hand on his arm. ]
[ That-- what's happening, right now? Reggie kisses him back, but briefly, before he looks at Nick again with a confused, vaguely troubled expression on his face. ]
Yeah, I'll be fine. Don't worry about that [ Why is he worried about it? ] Things always work out for me.
[ ... Anyway that's a fucking lie. But Reggie kisses him again, trying to settle him down. ]
[Nick, who is usually so calm, so in control, lost it. For a moment.
And he takes a breath, closes his eyes, and nods.]
Okay.
[Reggie will be fine.
He'll find some mortal girl - boy, whatever - one day, and he'll fall in love. And everything will turn out fine. Nick doesn't know why suddenly this feels so important, except that it does.]
I-
It's strange for me. To not have a coven. That's all.
[ Though Reggie isn't sure if that'll be as reassuring to Nick right now as it usually is, given how flustered he seems just by the possibility of Reggie being in love with him.
(Well, and some incriminating evidence to back that possibility up with, but it's still all just circumstantial. Jumping to conclusions.) ]
I, um-- [ Reggie pauses, biting the inside of his cheek in though for a moment before he makes a decision. ] And there is a girl back home, sort of. I never told you about her cuz we were never really like, official or anything, but...
[ Will this help? Before now Reggie always thought definitely not, but now he's much less sure; if Nick's so concerned about it, maybe this will set the matter to rest. ]
[ He's not gonna mention the fact that she called things off between them because her (ex-)boyfriend finally came home, but he also hasn't lied about anything. ]
I'm not like, in love with her, but I do like her a lot. [ Another pause. ] I like you a lot too, though.
[ This feels weird. It's too weird, but Reggie sighs, purses his lips, then continues: ]
I've been working with her at her speakeasy for a while. She was dating one of my best friends for a long time, but he had to leave town for a while, so the two of us just kind of... [ He inclines his head slightly. ] Happened. No one else really knows about it.
Cuz... [ Reggie pauses. ] We didn't know when Archie was gonna come back, if he ever even did-- and I don't think she knew yet if she was gonna want him back whenever she saw him again.
[ That's maybe a little overly generous, but whatever. It's fine. He has some distance from it all now, so this isn't quite as touchy for Reggie as it would have been a month or so ago, but he doesn't love talking about it, either. So he circles back a little: ]
Tell me about your... what was it, your coven? [ Reggie only kind of knows what that is, but. ] What do you miss about it?
Archie doesn't know about it here, either-- I haven't told him.
[ "Monogamy." Is that really what the whole thing boils down to? It almost seems insultingly oversimplified, but... that doesn't mean it isn't still true, maybe.
Reggie's quiet another moment, listening. He understands so much of that, missing his friends and missing home (even if there's plenty about home Reggie doesn't mind having a break from, either) but also so much that he can't, and never will. There's some things neither of them can give each other, maybe ever.
He lets out a breath, slinging an arm around Nick's shoulders to pull him into a hug, slapping him on the back with his other hand. ]
Hey.
[ Reggie doesn't know what else to say; he can't offer any of that except taking care of him (or trying to), but he just continues to hold him. ]
[But then Reggie is hugging him, and it's warm, and familiar, and comforting in a soft, smooth way. He closes his eyes and presses his face against Reggie's shoulder.]
[ Once he's holding Nick Reggie wishes he knew what else to say, but that's never been something that Reggie's good at-- he can do the physical comfort, he'll show up, he can be there, listen, distract, but articulating himself verbally is different. Nothing Reggie says ever seems to help people much, which is why he usually prefers to stick to what he knows. But...
He sighs slowly, stroking his hand up Nick's back and brushing it through his hair. ]
And I do get it, like... I miss home, too. [ Kinda. But mostly. He pulls back a little, so they can look at each other again. ] Sorry about your family. Is that what the whole "raised by wolves" thing was about?
[ Was that the wrong question? See, Reggie really isn't great at this. He's a little curious what happened to Nick's family, but knows better at least than to ask about it now. This is still better than how this conversation started. ]
No wonder we get along. [ He moves to mix Nick another drink. ] What is a familiar, anyway?
[ Whether Reggie outright thinks of it that way -- as a gesture of trust, a compromise -- isn't clear in his expression; he looks at Nick with a guarded sort of curiosity, trying to be careful now to maintain just a bit of emotional distance until, at least, they've moved on from this. Until he's more convinced Nick won't kick him out or something if he gets too uncomfortable thinking Reggie has "feelings." ]
You sure?
[ He thinks about it; what else he could ask, what he wants to know. ]
Cuz I'm not trying to like, figure you out or anything, I just... [ He pauses, and shrugs. ] I wanna do whatever will make you happier. You know, without all that.
[ It isn't an "I love you" (not that Reggie is looking for one), but no one's ever said this to Reggie either. Maybe a long time ago, as dopey kids meeting and discovering for the first time what friendship really was, but certainly not recently. All of Reggie's closest friends still have closer friends than him. ]
Oh. [ Reggie looks back, quiet for a long few seconds before he drops his gaze, nodding. ] You might be mine, too.
[ It's not a bad thing; a little bittersweet, maybe, to feel closer to Nick right now than he does to Archie, one of his best friends and someone whom he's known his whole life, but Nick's also invited Reggie into his life in much more intimate, open way. And it's nice to have that closeness somewhere, from someone. He puts his hand on Nick's. ]
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What's the point of mortality if you don't fall in love?
[He takes another drink.]
You have this short life, just ninety years. No magic. No certainty. That's the advantage you have.
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[ Nick's drinking that down pretty fast. Reggie puts a hand on his arm. ]
What's with you?
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He stands up and comes over to kiss Reggie again.]
But it can work out for you.
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Yeah, I'll be fine. Don't worry about that [ Why is he worried about it? ] Things always work out for me.
[ ... Anyway that's a fucking lie. But Reggie kisses him again, trying to settle him down. ]
Nick, tell me what's going on.
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And he takes a breath, closes his eyes, and nods.]
Okay.
[Reggie will be fine.
He'll find some mortal girl - boy, whatever - one day, and he'll fall in love. And everything will turn out fine. Nick doesn't know why suddenly this feels so important, except that it does.]
I-
It's strange for me. To not have a coven. That's all.
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[ Though Reggie isn't sure if that'll be as reassuring to Nick right now as it usually is, given how flustered he seems just by the possibility of Reggie being in love with him.
(Well, and some incriminating evidence to back that possibility up with, but it's still all just circumstantial. Jumping to conclusions.) ]
I, um-- [ Reggie pauses, biting the inside of his cheek in though for a moment before he makes a decision. ] And there is a girl back home, sort of. I never told you about her cuz we were never really like, official or anything, but...
[ Will this help? Before now Reggie always thought definitely not, but now he's much less sure; if Nick's so concerned about it, maybe this will set the matter to rest. ]
It's like I said, right? Nothing to worry about.
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What's her name?
[An important thing to know. Why, Nick also isn't sure, but at least this keeps him from going off the deep end again.]
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[ He's not gonna mention the fact that she called things off between them because her (ex-)boyfriend finally came home, but he also hasn't lied about anything. ]
I'm not like, in love with her, but I do like her a lot. [ Another pause. ] I like you a lot too, though.
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He thinks of that for a moment. Memorizes the name.]
Tell me about her.
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I've been working with her at her speakeasy for a while. She was dating one of my best friends for a long time, but he had to leave town for a while, so the two of us just kind of... [ He inclines his head slightly. ] Happened. No one else really knows about it.
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Why not?
[Why not, he asks. Why can't his friends know?]
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[ That's maybe a little overly generous, but whatever. It's fine. He has some distance from it all now, so this isn't quite as touchy for Reggie as it would have been a month or so ago, but he doesn't love talking about it, either. So he circles back a little: ]
Tell me about your... what was it, your coven? [ Reggie only kind of knows what that is, but. ] What do you miss about it?
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[He says it quietly. But he nods a little.]
My coven-
[He rubs his mouth.]
It was my community. My home. We could take care of each other. We talked about magic together, did spells, had holidays and rituals.
I miss my friends. I miss home.
[He misses a place where his morals aren't strange. He goes quiet a long time.]
After my parents died, my coven was my family.
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[ "Monogamy." Is that really what the whole thing boils down to? It almost seems insultingly oversimplified, but... that doesn't mean it isn't still true, maybe.
Reggie's quiet another moment, listening. He understands so much of that, missing his friends and missing home (even if there's plenty about home Reggie doesn't mind having a break from, either) but also so much that he can't, and never will. There's some things neither of them can give each other, maybe ever.
He lets out a breath, slinging an arm around Nick's shoulders to pull him into a hug, slapping him on the back with his other hand. ]
Hey.
[ Reggie doesn't know what else to say; he can't offer any of that except taking care of him (or trying to), but he just continues to hold him. ]
It'll be okay, Nick. I've got you.
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[But then Reggie is hugging him, and it's warm, and familiar, and comforting in a soft, smooth way. He closes his eyes and presses his face against Reggie's shoulder.]
Yeah.
I know you do.
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[ Once he's holding Nick Reggie wishes he knew what else to say, but that's never been something that Reggie's good at-- he can do the physical comfort, he'll show up, he can be there, listen, distract, but articulating himself verbally is different. Nothing Reggie says ever seems to help people much, which is why he usually prefers to stick to what he knows. But...
He sighs slowly, stroking his hand up Nick's back and brushing it through his hair. ]
And I do get it, like... I miss home, too. [ Kinda. But mostly. He pulls back a little, so they can look at each other again. ] Sorry about your family. Is that what the whole "raised by wolves" thing was about?
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He knows what he did, and he hates it.]
My familiar took care of my after my family died. She's a werewolf.
That's what it means. I was raised by a wolf.
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No wonder we get along. [ He moves to mix Nick another drink. ] What is a familiar, anyway?
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[He looks up an away, a little.]
They talk to us. And help us with magic.
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[ A werewolf, because Reggie totally wants to know if it's a random thing or based on someone's personality, but he cuts himself off. ]
Uh... sorry, we don't have to keep talking about this. I like hearing it, though. I don't really know that much about you.
[ And vice versa, really; they don't do a lot of deep talking about their normal lives. ]
Or witches.
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I'll answer whatever you want.
[That's what Reggie gets, answers from Nick that no one else has.]
Her name is Amalia. She was given to me when I was born.
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You sure?
[ He thinks about it; what else he could ask, what he wants to know. ]
Cuz I'm not trying to like, figure you out or anything, I just... [ He pauses, and shrugs. ] I wanna do whatever will make you happier. You know, without all that.
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You're my closest friend here.
[That means a lot to Nick, who is used to traveling in groups, used to having at least two other people at his side.]
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Oh. [ Reggie looks back, quiet for a long few seconds before he drops his gaze, nodding. ] You might be mine, too.
[ It's not a bad thing; a little bittersweet, maybe, to feel closer to Nick right now than he does to Archie, one of his best friends and someone whom he's known his whole life, but Nick's also invited Reggie into his life in much more intimate, open way. And it's nice to have that closeness somewhere, from someone. He puts his hand on Nick's. ]
Do you really mean that?
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I'm not above lying. But I won't lie to you. If you ask me anything, if I tell you something, I promise. I won't lie to you.
[And he kisses him again.]
I mean that.
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